What Happened? What Did You Get Done?
I was driving
along with Steve the other day and said there are people I just don’t know well
enough asking me what operation I had. I mean if it was something to do with my
girly bits, what do I say? Or perhaps I had a colonoscopy - do I tell them ‘I
had a camera shoved up my arse?’
The problem is, I
know I do it myself. You can’t help but ask. I don’t believe it’s essentially a nosy thing, I think we’re all just looking to understand the seriousness of what has
happened to someone so we can offer the appropriate level of reassurance to
their situation. Or maybe I’m over-complicating things? Maybe we are nosy?
Maybe nothing is sacred anymore?
When people tell
me they’ve had an operation, I often find the words spilling out of my mouth “what
happened? What did you get done?” But I always, always stop and say: “I am so
sorry! Of course you don’t need to answer that question. You might have gone
through something incredibly private or you just don’t want to tell me. I’m
sorry for asking.”
When that happens,
people have an opportunity to respond to the initial question if they want to, or
they can say thanks for giving me a get out clause.
It’s not
dissimilar to the question: “when’s the baby due?” Always a question you regret
asking, especially when the person says: “I’m not pregnant, I’m just fat.” Doh!
Don’t ask that question ever, ever again, unless you’re 100 percent sure the
person IS pregnant OK? That is my rule.
I often find it
interesting that there are just a few, small, situations, where a perfectly
normal person – who typically engages their mind and heart before they open
their mouth – finds that whatever mechanism is in place to stop them asking the
inappropriate questions, seems to get bypassed. What operation have you had is
one of those questions.
But getting back
to my conversation with Steve. He came up with a perfect response:
"It’s simple, you tell them you had your left
labia sculpted into the shape of a rose” and then you leave them with that.
Perfect no?
Can anyone top
Steve’s response?
Go on, give me a
laugh. It’s been a tough couple of weeks.
Yours, without the
bollocks
Andrea
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