A Thing or Two Kids Could Teach Us
I’m regularly
seen out and about in Singapore with my two lads, taking them to the various
parks and playgrounds across the island. As I hang around - sweltering in the
heat while watching my little loves have fun - I spend a lot of time pondering.
A recent ponder is our kids could teach us a great lesson if only we were all open
to learning it - and that is a lesson of acceptance.
When I take the
boys to a playground, they are more often than not, the only Caucasian (or white)
kids there. For the first few minutes,
Lex and Jax hang out together, relying on each other while they scope out the
new environment. However they quickly branch out, finding partners in crime that
are into their “style” of play, and off they go with their new pals to enjoy
themselves. As a general rule, Lex goes for the extreme sports fans, while Jax
is more focused on digging and intellectualising about stuff with his new
friends.
When they identify
suitable playmates, they don’t say you’re a boy or a girl and therefore this is
how we should play, because sex doesn’t matter. Neither do they look at kids
and say you’re Malay or Chinese or Indian or African or Bangladeshi or Pilipino
or a combination of all of these, because they don’t see anything other than another
human being. And they never say you’re Muslim or Atheist or Buddhist or Hindu
or Christian or Taoist or whatever, because who cares, we’re here to play.
My boy’s
decision making parameters are very clear – in the affirmative it’s a case of
you’re my kind of kid, let’s go. Or conversely, when they identify that someone
is not their kind of kid, they don’t get all hot and bothered about it. They
recognise it for what it is – a lack of synergy between two people – and promptly
just ignore each other.
I don’t know
when awareness of differences kicks in – I’m presuming we haven’t got too much
longer with our boys - but one of the main reasons I love living in Singapore
is they are around people from all over the world ALL of the time – and seriously,
every type of person is here. Singapore is awesome for that and also the main reason
Steve and I love it. With my lads I am very hopeful this exposure will make the
physical differences between people less important to them. I don’t know for
certain if it will, but I am certainly very hopeful that it will help a lot. We
shall see.
All I know for
sure is they’re definitely off to a great start with best pals and gals from all
around this fine world, and I sincerely hope they can be a new kind of person
in the world – a person that doesn’t see skin differences first, because for
them, it’s all about heart.
Us adults could
learn a lot from that.
One day my boys
may ask me how I decide who I like and why? I will gladly tell them that MY decision
making parameter has always been this – I don’t care where you’re from or how
much money you do or do not have, are you a nice person or are you an arsehole?
That’s all there is to it really.
I just hope my
boys stay true to the path they’re on now, because that would be awesome and I’d
be a very proud Mumma. Then again, I don’t plan on giving them too much choice
in the matter.
Yours, without
the bollocks
Andrea
Comments
I used to get such a kick out of that in Sing, as much for myself as anyone. I'd think back on a get together and the fact that one person was Mexican and one was Italian, there were a few Aussies (there always are!), as well as Brits, Japanese and great mixes of Fiji/Chinese, etc. It's never the easiest of parties, but it's those that you are so proud to be part of. Fin's best friend at pre-school was Japanese and he didn't speak much English. I said to him, "Do you and Go speak to each other?" Fin shrugged and said, "We say 'ohayou'. If only I could just build blocks and do puzzles with other adults I meet today. In the absence of that, I will strive for us all to stay groovy and as we have been.