Why Does Anyone Care About Gay Marriage?

The last week has been pretty interesting on the Gay marriage front don’t you think? The first sitting US president says he supports it (yay for Obama!) and if you missed it, here are his exact words, however in the same week North Carolina re-banned it, but have no issue with their standing law that cousins can marry... I find the whole discussion truly bizarre, because why does it matter so much to people? Why does anyone who is not gay care that gay people get married? There are two areas that bewilder me.

The first has to be the case of the “religious” arguing the case – and I’m pretty much focusing on Christians here, because this is where the current argument resides most strongly in relation to the current news. Please understand that this is not an anti-Christian post, because most of the people I know who follow a Christian faith are loving people, accepting of all. However, for the people actively protesting against the right for gay  people to marry, well these Christians are claiming it’s because marriage is a sacred union between two people, but it’s main “job,” so to speak, is procreation.

But this argument doesn’t stand up today, because married couples choosing not to have children is on the rise, and the majority of folk having kids are not married at all. According to this article, marriage with children is actually becoming an elite institution in the US and then this rather flimsy article talks about it again, claiming "about 65 percent say that the main purpose is to form a union for personal happiness and fulfilment as opposed to having and raising children," said Cary Funk, a senior researcher at Pew Research Center. In fact, when you read this article, children are listed below sharing house hold duties as a priority in many marriages today.

Moving onto divorce statistics, according to this article, atheists divorce less than Christians AND the highest divorce rates are in the bible belt, which is repeated in this other article. Additionally, another stat from Wikipedia, claims that 40% of all marriages in the US end in divorce. So um, can someone please explain to me why the sanctity of marriage is part of this argument when it comes to gay marriage when it’s very clear Christians are doing such a poor job of it? I think the sanctity of marriage, as defined by a 2,000 year old religion, has already altered so radically, this argument just doesn’t stand up for me.

The other issue about Gay marriage for me is this question - does it cost “the people” anything? Are gay couples a burden on the State? If you haven’t heard of it, the “Pink Pound” is an economic term that describes the financial power of this community, as two same sex couples, without kids, have a greater chance of earning more money than most. In the US gay people are generally considered economically advantaged, and as it’s also such a strong and supportive community, they take care of their own – further reducing the chance of any burden on the State. So this is also part of my confusion. Gay people getting married makes absolutely no impact on the rest of us. They don’t cost us anything, and if we choose, we need never have gay people in our lives, so why is it such a big deal to people? Which I suppose brings it back to the religious argument.

I can’t write about this without mentioning some of the disgusting “Christian” antics in regards to homosexuality in the case of the Westboro Baptist Church protesting at Military funerals (check out this video – outrageous - and the Tyra Banks one) “claiming God is killing troops in Iraq and Afghanistan to punish the United States for tolerating homosexuality.” I mean is that Christian? Seriously, I appreciate that this is only one very small sect within Christianity, but if there is a God, I can’t imagine She is sitting in heaven, looking down on those antics with a smile on Her face, saying good on you boys and girls – you are representing me well! That is not the sort of God I could ever believe in – can you? And yet everyone involved in these protests is claiming they speak in God’s name when it comes to homosexuality being an abomination. Did I miss something here? Didn’t God create us in Her own image? If so, homosexuals would be included, yes? Or is there another human master craftsmen in the mix the Church didn’t tell me about?

The way I see it is this – if two people love each other and want to make a commitment to each other, why not? It doesn’t hurt another living soul, so why is it an issue for the rest of us? Why can’t we just mind out own bloody business when it comes to this issue? Let’s face it, the traditional model of marriage has been deteriorating for the last half century, and I believe it’s only going to continue to erode if society doesn’t clean up its act and get focused on the things that are important – like supporting families, of any description. I believe all of these Christian groups who are protesting against Gay marriage need to look at themselves and focus on their own shit, rather than getting involved in something that doesn’t concern or impact them at all. Maybe at the same time they could also relearn Christian values?

We need to move on from this discussion, allowing all people to live as they wish – as long as they are doing no harm to others - while also remembering one of the best teachings of the Church – Thou Shalt Not Judge. And while we’re at it, perhaps another little goodie attributed to Jesus “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

And to my dear gay friends, who I feel so privileged to know because you’ve always been little rays of sunshine in my life, if you want to make the commitment and marry your love, I hope you have the right to do that soon – if you haven’t already. All I ask is please; can I be invited to the wedding? I know you guys and gals will certainly throw the best parties.

Yours, without the bollocks

Andrea